From my peregrination into the world of modern and neomodern expression came the following works of lasting, expressive and emotional…nay, spiritual convection.

May Picasso forever lament he never knew the name…Benson!

Please make all payments to The Jon Benson Foundation For Humanities And Insanity In The Arts.

I know…they just take your breath away. They did that to me, too. I had to find a brown paper bag, breathe in, breathe out…but yeah, I’m okay now.

It gets worse. I duplicated a “painting” found on display. I’m not kidding…it look like this:

At some point, you just have to raise your and and ask the tour guide, “Okay, so…what…your 5-year-old did this and you’re just testing our gullibility?”

A red rectangle. Seriously now, can you just picture running this piece of utter crap art by Michelangelo? “Say Mickey…what ‘cha think of my latest exploration into the world of odd-shaped squares?”

I’d pay good money to hear his reply — especially given that he’s dead.

I leave you with the immortal words of Val Kilmer from the film, Tombstone: “…draw.” {10}